Until recently, Wagner’s ring has been difficult for most of us to penetrate. Access to his darkest area has traditionally been restricted to those lucky few capable of maintaining strong, determined strokes of scholarly investigation.
Happily, DiGaetani provides everyone – including the most intellectually well-endowed amongst us – with the tools needed to effortlessly prize apart Wagner’s ring and plunder its forbidden contents. DiGaetani’s main thrust shows that perseverance and a firm-hand are all that is needed to enter Wagner.
Oiled with this literary lubricant, you will find yourself repeatedly sliding deep into Wagner’s ring until a satisfying climax is reached.

Read all on Amazon!

Wagner’s Ring is, admittedly, not easy for the uninitiated to penetrate. The tight composition conceals its dark, primal secrets, sluiced with heroic blood. It is also exceedingly long, and the unwary explorer, even one mightily endowed with musician erudition, can become lost in its complex folds.
However, Di Gaetani’s treatment of this rare and sensitive circle provides ample intellectual lubrication for those who, in the words of the great philosopher Cobb, wish to “go deeper.” After you have read this book…

Read all on Amazon!

Those of you who follow my reviews know that I have a fondness for classy headware. When I go out to the discos, I like to be looking my best and I needed a hat that would go nicely with my white Saturday Night Fever style leisure suit. The Milk Carton Hood Adult Hat looked promising. I have a silk shirt that perfectly matches the blue writing on the carton and alot of ladies have told me that when I combine the Milk Carton Hood Adult Hat with that particular shirt, it really draws attention to my “pretty blue eyes” (blush). A hat like this exudes confidence. It says…

Read all on Amazon!

I always had this odd feeling that somehow my two fathers might have lied about being my maternal birth parents. Aside from them having bright white skin, red hair, and blue eyes, compared to my dark brown skin, black hair, and aptitude at sports. My biology teacher seemed to hint that somehow a women might also be involved in the birthing process. Anyway it wasn’t until posting pictures of myself in this nifty hat on my face book that I got the call that changed my life. A women by the name of Shaniqua (probably misspelled) Washington contacted me saying that she in fact was my long lost mother. I was of course in utter… disbelief so she produced various news paper articles and explained that her son was taking from her.
After a few hours of trying to convince this women that there was no possible way I could be her long lost son, I decided to produce my identification cards which clearly stated that my last name was not Washington, making it impossible that I could have been her child. Furthermore the pictures with the newspaper articles clearly showed a baby in a dark black blanket, and I am a nearly full grown adult much to mature for a black blanky (mine is a light grey). My closing argument and most damning evidence of all, was…

Read all on Amazon!

I was going to buy a $2.82 hdmi cable on amazon and then I came across this masterpiece, and I knew I had to do whatever it takes to get it. After getting a 3 month advance on my salary thanks to the fine folks at the check cashing place who only charged me a 35% interest rate, I was in business to finally own one of these beauties. Because of the price amazon decided to send the hdmi cable by armored car. Originally I was going to use the money to buy an engagement ring for my girlfriend, but I came upon this cable and decided this could keep me warm at night all by itself. So I dumped the girlfriend, and now when not in use, this cable tucks itself in next to me all snug and warm. It even reads bed time stories to me from time to time which help with my night terrors.
As to when this cable is plugged in, oh wow, the picture literally jumps off the screen and into my living room. It even makes commercials come alive, there was one for the angus burger at mcd’s and I was hungry and all i had to do was reach out towards the screen and grab it and bam dinner was served. You have to be careful with that feature though because you will gain weight spending too much time on the couch. The best part is…

Read all on Amazon!

I would like to preface this review with the fact that I am from the planet Norx’Blath and live in a pod-station where HD television is outlawed, mainly due to reminding everyone of the days when my people lived in barbarism and savageness, watching television using analog signals.

However, I have very fond memories of receiving an HDTV when I was 267 years old, merely an infant. I had just bought an HDTV but needed a suitable HDMI cable, and after seeing this on amazon.paralleluniverse.uk for the unbeatable price of 3z^87 phlangths (2,500 of your American Earth dollars), I just couldn’t resist the nostalgia and had it delivered overnight using Amazon Prime Illegal Smuggling (and just for the record, I would like to give props to those guys for delivering across 26 dimensions of space time in less than 6 of your Earth hours. Great dedication, or as they say in my pod-station: GARXXXX).
I was so excited, almost going so far as to trip the emotional alarms the newest dictator had installed in our pods. However, I turned down my EMOTION dial and received the shipment the way most illegal shipments are received on my planet: through the cut-glass plumbing (don’t ask). I hooked it up immediately and started playing a game on the GameStation Interstellar Network powered by AT&T.
In fact, I had hooked it up so fast that I hadn’t even noticed the color, which was black. You see, on Norx’Blath, black is the color one uses when he has cheated on his significant other with galactic farm animals. A very specific situation, yes, and it pains me to admit it is very common on Norx’Blath. But since…

Read all on Amazon!

I was once asked on the street by a hobo in rags to define epic. I was perplexed. I mean, there is that song by Faith No More, there is nuking the opposition on Call of Duty, there is chugging two liters of beer from a boot and then, there is this.
If you are reading this then you are looking at the Alpha and Omega of back mounted property retention systems. Don’t you dare call it a book bag. I tried once, it became sentient and cut me on the face, right across the cheek. It did this so others would know, it is no book bag. I made the mistake and live with the scars, don’t follow my lead. But on the upside I now have a wicked scar on my cheek which looks double wicked mated with the included eye masks. I believe the back…

Read all on Amazon!

Finally, a rubber scrotum that I can use for exam training purposes. My room mate was going “nuts” (pardon the pun) because I kept trying to use his. I wish he wasn’t such a light sleeper. Oh well.

Read all on Amazon!

I certainly can’t find a better way to spend a hundred and sixty five bucks than on a rubber scrotum. Hell, at that price they’re practically giving them away! You’d have to be NUTS not to buy one! Now I can take a break from squeezing my own scrotum constantly and…

Read all on Amazon!

PING! The magic duck!
Using deft allegory, the authors have provided an insightful and intuitive explanation of one of Unix’s most venerable networking utilities. Even more stunning is that they were clearly working with a very early beta of the program, as their book first appeared in 1933, years (decades!) before the operating system and network infrastructure were finalized.
The book describes networking in terms even a child could understand, choosing to anthropomorphize the underlying packet structure. The ping packet is described as a duck, who, with other packets (more ducks), spends a certain period of time on the host machine (the wise-eyed boat). At the same time each day (I suspect this is scheduled under cron), the little packets (ducks) exit the host (boat) by way of a bridge (a bridge). From the bridge, the packets travel onto the internet (here embodied by the Yangtze River).
The title character — er, packet, is called Ping. Ping meanders around the river before….

Read all on Amazon!

I live near a park and frequently walk around the local area. Given the amount of dog mess that is on the pavements I thought this book would be the ideal read to stop me having to scrape my shoes on the grass before going home. It was only after it arrived that I looked closely at the title and realised it said ‘How to Avoid Huge SHIPS’. A simple error that means I am still treading on massive examples of canine excrement. Having said that, I read the book anyway, and…

Read all on Amazon!

Read this book before going on vacation and I couldn’t find my cruise liner in the port. Vacation ruined.

Read all on Amazon!

I should probably preface this review by stating the obvious: This shirt is clearly meant for people who aren’t serious about our one-horned magic friends. I mean, the shirt’s fabric construction and lavender color base are terrific, and as a casual-Friday garment, hey, it’s better than a stupid Polo shirt. But the devil, as they say, is in the details, so caveat emptor!
First, the grass pictured is quite clearly Italian Ryegrass, and as everyone knows, unicorns prefer to frolic in Dog’s Tooth Grass. Second, notice the gray spots on the unicorn’s rear flank; are they patterned to look like a fairy? I think not. Third, why is the tip of the unicorn’s horn glowing like some defective reindeer’s nose??? We all know the horn is pure gold, but if the illustrator was trying to convey this specific coloration, then…

Read all on Amazon!

Alone in my dark apartment, having worn my 3 Wolf Moon T-Shirt as well for countless weeks, found this book to be my bible. I sit at my dining room table, playing World of Warcraft night after night, sobbing silently for want of notice by another human being. Pizza boxes piling up, chinese food leftovers filling my fridge, I was beginning to run out of options. I recently lost my job as a Custodial Consultant for sniffing the amonia in the utility closet. My funding for my gourmet meals from such world reknown chefs as Boyardi and Uncle Ben had begun running low. Stumbling in a drunken daze through the local bookstore, my elbow carelessly knocked a book onto the floor as I turned a corner. As I peered down, I saw the title, “Microwave Cooking for One.”
Curiously, I picked it up and decided to have a a quick read. As I began flipping through the pages, I began to see that this was no ordinary cookbook. No my friends, this was a book passed down from the Gods themselves, displaying…

Read all on Amazon!

REVIEW

Read all on Amazon!

Guys… don’t buy this book if you ever want to live a life that isn’t constantly filled with pain. Since the first moment I saw the face of the woman on the cover I can’t get my mind off of it.
From day to day I’ll put the book in my european carry-all. I bring her around and take pictures with her doing fun things. I hold up the book, hug it adoringly, and snap away. Sometimes I’ll take it to lunch. I don’t read it, but instead I just set it across the table from myself and have conversations with it… I mean… her. *sigh* I’m such a wreck. All I want to know is where I can find this gorgeous woman. Does she always wear those glasses? Is her nose that perfect in real life? Does she make love to me the way her picture on the book does?
I just feel so hopeless. In the meantime I have called her Helen. Only the most beautiful….

Read all on Amazon!